Friday Firsts: The Mean Green Juice Machine

​​I’m not trying to be dramatic at all, but when I think of “green juice” the image that comes to mind is a thick, seedy substance that tastes like leaves. I’m picturing a full on tree being grinded up in a blender with a little bit of water, appetizing right?

I mean, I've heard of people eating tree bark but I always thought that was in prehistoric times. So when my manager at Ketanga (I'm the summer intern!) told me she wanted me to try a green juice for my series, it’s safe to say I wasn’t too excited. Flashback to two Friday’s ago when I JUST tried my first salad – how am I supposed to drink leaves if I’ve barely begun eating them?! 

​When I walk into the juice store, I’m already dreading what I’m going to have to order. The creamy peanut butter smoothie catches my eye, but unfortunately that’s not an option today. So I muster up some courage and order a green drink called “hail to kale” that is made from kale, shocker, watermelon, apple, and lemon. I’ve calmed down a little because I love fruit and it distracts me from the fact that I’m about to drink a leaf. In fact, a lot of the drinks on the menu contained more fruit, it seemed, than vegetables, which showed me just how little I knew about what actually goes into green juices. I wait patiently for my order, number 10, and already start to think about what I’m going to order afterwards. 

Shock number one: MY DRINK IS NOT GREEN. I’m actually a little bit more upset about this than I thought I would be. The whole point of me ordering a green juice was to get the full experience, and honestly I’m feeling a little cheated. Also, I’m starting to get confused about the supposed vegetable base.

​Shock number two: IT DOESN’T TASTE LIKE VEGETABLES. Not only was the drink surprisingly sweet, it was surprisingly smooth. Like no seeds at all really, and no crunchy parts that I thought would sneak through the straw. At first instinct, it tastes like a watered down apple juice, but then I realize it’s just the watermelon talking. I’m even more confused now. Am I just drinking a fruit smoothie? What’s the difference? WHAT EVEN IS KALE?! 

​Shock number three: I’m not repulsed. I’m not even mad. I take another sip of my drink. It’s 75 degrees outside and I’m feeling refreshed. I’m still pondering the questionable brown color of my green drink. I get a burrito. I take another sip of my drink. I go back to work and continue doing my research about the power of athleisure (blog post coming soon!). I take another sip of my drink. I’m halfway done! ​I’d like to apologize to all green drinks out there for generalizing your make up and putting you all in the same category – no two are the same. You’re not all bad. Some of you are even okay! And the best part is you’re full of surprises. 

I’ve learned a lot from trying my first green juice. I’ve learned that I shouldn’t judge a book by its cover, and that preconceptions can be far from reality. I feel a little silly now for thinking that all green juices were just essentially plants in liquid form. I’ve learned that even the most unappealing of substances can be the best for you and your body, and that looks aren’t everything. ​Finally, I learned that trying new things and going out of your comfort zone isn’t all that terrible, and that sometimes good outcomes can come from the most unexpected choices. I guess you could say that all of life’s biggest lessons can be learned from green juices – but again, not dramatic at all. 

By Hannah

Hannah Jacobs, newfound wellness enthusiast, is spending her summer trying a variety of fitness & wellness firsts. She will return every Wednesday to share her experiences and insights. ​